Why won’t someone hire me?

Turns out – someone did!  Just took His timing.  I started working at Vanguard Skin Specialists almost 3 months to the day that we arrived in Colorado.  It took trust (and patience) that He had a plan for me, and that meant turning down a job in the process.  I received a different job offer the same week I accepted a Patient Care Coordinator position at Vanguard.  And then received numerous phone calls after that for interviews at places I thought I was very interested in working.  But it is apparent to me that this is the place I’m supposed to be.  It blends my relational and administrative sides very well, and I work with a great staff of people.

When will I make friends?

I’m nowhere near having the type of friendships here that I had in Manhattan, but I at least have had glimpses of the beginning of possible good friendships.  And that is encouraging!

Which church should we choose?

We attended a church for a month and a half, but we didn’t feel settled in choosing to stay there.  So, the hunt began again.  Thankfully, it only took a couple weeks before we went somewhere that we both really liked.  We’ve gone four Sundays now and are still pleased.  We have yet the hear the senior pastor, but are looking forward to getting that next week.  It’s about the same size as the church we came from, and the people seem so intentional.  They recognize we’re new and want to meet us, and then remember us the next week.  Love that!

When will it get nice enough on a weekend to be outside?

Ha!  Well, when it finally stopped snowing off and on (mid May), we got to start enjoying little bits of Colo Spgs.  It has been nice!

Am I having days of purpose right now?  Is this just wasted time?

Looking back over the 3 months of unemployment and not knowing many people, I still don’t know how to answer this question.  After we had been here for about a month, I tried to look at my weeks more assertively.  Thinking through what errands would be best to do when, etc.  I joined a summer women’s Bible study that met June-July, and that was very helpful.  It was something that added a little more discipline to my life, and accountability with it.  But, I also gave myself more grace to enjoy having the time off and enjoying something relaxing each day.  Once June hit, I tried to go to the pool daily for a couple of hours when it was nice out (and got to meet neighbors through that as well), or I went to a coffee shop or watched a movie, etc.

What are the real desires and passions of my heart?

Oh, this one is hard.  I want to know the answer, but I’m afraid to as well.

How can I be a better wife today?

And this one is hard too.  :)  I think the biggest answer I’ve discovered these days is: Spend the time with God that I need.  I can so clearly see that I’m a more nagging, impatient, easily frustrated, and selfish wife when I haven’t given God any time.

Where does my encouragement come from?

From the Lord.  And He often sends encouragement through friends, family, and Jeremiah as well.

When will I feel comfortable here?  When will I feel like myself again?

The last month or so this has really started improving.  I’m not feeling as scared, nervous, and lonely as I was at the beginning.  I think it will be a slow process, but I am grateful that it has begun.

One of the good parts about having actually written these questions down, is that now I can look back and really see how God has provided and answered.  He did not abandon, He was there and still is.

But, for me, a hug is worth a lot.  Receiving or giving.  And I miss them.  I hug my hubby all the time … cling to him sometimes.  And often he just laughs and shakes his head after two or three hugs in a row.  And it is great, but I really miss hugging friends.

Yesterday morning I met up with a gal I had known at K-State who lives in the Springs now.  And we hugged when we saw each other – that’s when I realized how much I miss having enough of a connection and comfortability with a friend to hug in greeting or goodbye.  I look forward to the day when I can hug a friend that I’ve made in this new city.  That will be a sign for me that there have been connections made, that this can be a place I experience community.

I like hugs.

Why won’t someone hire me?

When will I make friends?

Which church should we choose?

When will it get nice enough on a weekend to be outside?

Am I having days of purpose right now?  Is this just wasted time?

What are the real desires and passions of my heart?

How can I be a better wife today?

Where does my encouragement come from?

When will I feel comfortable here?  When will I feel like myself again?

This move has presented challenges that neither of us expected.  But, we can already see how God is using these challenges to grow our marriage and I can see it forcing both of us to seek God.  Life had gotten pretty comfortable in Manhattan … not that there wasn’t growth there, because there was.  Moving here has sped up growth and has forced me to examine my heart daily.  This has brought lots of confession and humility.  Questions like the ones above feel good to ask, but it’s hard not always getting an answer.

Last week I attended a women’s night at one of the churches we’ve attended.  The speaker talked about how every day is like a blank canvas – no matter how messy our canvas got yesterday, each day God offers a new fresh start.  The last point she ended on was this:

“Let go of control and trust Him for the outcome.  We are not to worry about, to try to anticipate, to use energy to figure out how God will work.  It is for us to trust that He will work.”

Oh God, help me learn to trust.

In 9 days my husband and I are going to move to Colorado.  I never thought that I would live in Manhattan forever, but now that the reality is sinking in that we are leaving … the sadness of leaving is beginning to set in.  Manhattan has been so much more to me than I ever expected.  It’s where I went to college, where I “grew up,” where I met God in a completely new way, where I have made lifelong friends on a deeper level than any friendships I’ve had before, where I had my first adult job, where I discovered what health insurance was, where I purchased my first car, where I lived the longest, and where I met my husband.  Manhattan has truly been my first home outside of my parents’ home.

I had no idea that God had all this planned for me when I left O’Fallon, IL, to attend Kansas State University.  But I cannot be more grateful for His plans.  And this gives me great courage to take this step forward in faith.  I believe that He truly does have a plan for me and my husband.

So, to help with this reflecting process, here’s a picture from each of my eight years in Manhattan.  :)

Joanna and I in our dorm room freshman year.  Ha ha!

The LIFE group I was in sophomore and junior year.  These girls have been so important in my life!

Rachel and I.  Best friends for life!  :)  2nd year as an RA’s in Goodnow Hall.

Senior year Kimberly and I decided to sell a year’s worth of cakes at the Challenge Auction.  This is the one we made for the display, I think we made two others after this … this was the best one by far!

First of three years on Christian Challenge staff with this amazing group of people.

First year living with the Classens.  Loved it!

Joanna and I live together again!  All grown up this time … well, sort of.

Started dating a really great guy and married him!

Enjoyed 9 wonderful first months of marriage.

These pictures just barely skim the surface of the last eight years.  There might be some more posts of reflection before we move.  So much to think about, so much to be thankful for.

We felt like we were most impacted by the topics of debt and savings.  The class presented some great thoughts about these two areas as well as practical “how-to’s.”  So, we’re very excited to be making large steps of progress in getting out of consumer debt while still being able to put some aside in savings.  And for the next few months we’ll be trying out a written down spending plan, rather than the envelope system or something on the computer.  We think that it will be better for us to have to manually write it down and have it somewhere that both of us can can easy get to it.

This class was just right for us – felt very low pressure and all the scripture that was used was very appropriate and eye opening.  It had a great balance of looking practically at finances as well as discussing what life application this all has.  We also had the chance to get down to the heart issues that money can bring to the surface.

I’m so glad that we got to take this class!  And I’m even more glad that I can cross it off the list.

Chocolate Chip Brownies

Melt 1/3 C margarine; add 1 C brown sugar.

Beat, then add:
1 Tbsp water
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla

To above, add and mix:
1 C flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 C nuts (optional)
1/8 tsp baking soda

Spread in greased 9X9 inch pan.  Sprinkle with 1/2 bag of chocolate chips (I did both white & semi-sweet chips).  Bake at 350 degrees for 20 to 25 minutes.  (Can be doubled, use 9X13 inch pan.  Bake for 30 to 35 minutes or until tests done with toothpick.)

#64 – Go on at least one date a year. Jeremiah’s and my first date was on January 6th, pretty great way to kick-off the best year of my life!  He took me to Houlihan’s and to see Sherlock Holmes.  I haven’t been on many first dates, but I’ve got to say that this one was pretty stellar.  I knew immediately that I liked this guy.  Here’s a video that some sweet girls took right before Jeremiah picked me up.  It’s through Skype, so that’s why I’m in the computer.

#70 – Watch all the AFI top 100 movies – Hoosiers. Jeremiah looked at my blog and saw my 101 list and decided that he wanted to help accomplish this fun task.  He especially likes the movie challenge and happens to own a few of the movies that I haven’t seen.  So, for our second date he had me over and made me dinner, then we watched Hoosiers.  I knew that I couldn’t blog about this one right away, because I couldn’t remember half of the movie.  And still don’t actually.  Come on, I was sitting next to this cute guy on his couch, how could I pay attention?!  But, still I watched it and I’m sure that we will watch it again sometime.

#52 – Take a group of friends to St. Louis. When I originally wrote this list, I imagined taking a small group of girlfriends.  It ended up being just me and “my Jeremiah friend.”  We went the first weekend of February because I helped out with a youth weekend near there.  Jeremiah stayed with his friend in STL.  On Sunday afternoon I got to show him around town – we went up the arch and to the zoo before driving back to Manhattan.  We had a great time!

#59 – Go to the Top of the World (Manhattan, KS). I definitely didn’t expect that my first time visiting the Top of the World would be for my engagement pictures.  It was a very windy day, but we had a great time!  Our amazing photographer, Erica, did a fantastic job!

#56 – Learn how to make fresh white bread. My good friend Kelsey is a baker and she was kind enough to teach me how to make bread.  We had so much fun making bread in the bakery science lab last month.  It smells so good!  Here are some pictures from the process:

#13 – Take a train somewhere. Jeremiah and I went to Atlantic City, NJ, for our honeymoon.  It was great!  So relaxing.  While researching AC and deciding what to do, we looked at how close New York City was and found that a train ran from AC to NYC on the weekends.  It’s only a 2 1/2 hour trip and super cheap tickets.  And we were excited that this would take care of #13 on the list!  Here’s video that we took:

#46 – Make homemade ice cream. I totally forgot that this was on my list!  My parents bought us an electric ice cream maker for a wedding shower gift and our first night back in Manhattan after the honeymoon we had all the Wenzel siblings over for some homemade ice cream.  While enjoying this delicious treat we opened wedding gifts.  Very fun night!  Sadly no pictures, though.

I am looking forward to continuing the work on this list.  With just over a year left for the project, I’m not if I’ll complete it all.  But I’ll be enjoying what I can get done!

My friend, Shylu, was with us for Thanksgiving.  It was fun to experience something for the first time all together with her!

Sadly, the pictures do not do the lights justice, and the video that I took isn’t uploading.  If you’ve never seen the lights at the plaza, you should go if you get the chance!

I am not a Walmart hater – just wanted to say that first thing.  The reason that I put this one down on my list was because I went there so often.  I think on average I went to Walmart probably about 2-3 times a week; I went for my normal grocery shopping and for any random things needed (food, work supplies, light bulbs, Christmas decor, make-up … you get the point).  So, this was more of a challenge for me to just see if I could do it.  Could I go a month without going to Walmart?

So the results: it wasn’t as hard as I was expecting.  But this is mostly because two months ago a Hy-Vee opened in town.  This has become my new favorite for grocery shopping because it’s a more enjoyable experience and I’m not spending much more on groceries.  So then for all that other random stuff I just had to figure out different ways to get it.  I went to Target a few times, or found other places in Manhattan to get stuff.   Or else I could decide to just go without what I thought that I had desperately needed.  :)

I saw the play “Harvey” while in high school and really enjoyed it. I was glad to see it on the AFI top 100 films list so it gave me a reminder to watch the movie! It was very enjoyable – I love watching Jimmy Stewart in any role, and this one was especially wonderful. He is so convincing that he really does see a tall white rabbit; he looks up at Harvey while he talks, he lets him pass through the doorway first, he puts his arm around him as he walks. Everyone knows who Harvey is. Some people carry on like Harvey’s really there, while others are completely freaked out by Elwood’s imaginary friend.

The best part is Elwood’s genuine friendliness. He is kind to everyone! He wants everyone to meet his “dear friend, Harvey” and is constantly inviting people to dinner; even if he had just met them 5 minutes before. You can see people’s faces change as they talk with Elwood … even the angriest cab driver can become happy after a two minute conversation with Elwood.

So, is Elwood dangerously crazy or not? That’s the question. You’ve got to watch it to see what happens!